Loveology

Every single person on this planet earth possesses an innate desire to love and to be loved. It is an intrinsic part of being human. Because we are made in God's image and likeness, we are made to love.

Sadly, human nature leads to countless broken relationships, unhappy marriages, painful divorces, and damaged people. Society's increasingly fluid definitions of love do not aid the situation.

Loveology, written by Pastor John Mark Comer, breaks down the essence of a true relationship into a raw, unfiltered conversation threaded with his own autobiographical touch. He addresses everything from dating and gender roles to the deeper aspects of marriage, all while supporting his thoughts with Scripture.

I cannot say that I have ever truly been in love, or even that I know what it feels like or means to be in love. I catch glimpses of love on a daily basis - in my parents and grandparents, my friends who are dating, and in my teachers.

As part of my senior year, I take a required theology class on marriage. My teacher is wonderful; he has five children with his high school sweetheart. It always amazes me to watch the grace with which he upholds his faith without imposing judgement on others. The class is not an easy one to teach, and he manages to explain the Catholic view on marriage without offending or looking down on anyone who may not agree with or follow the Church's teachings.

In the course of this class, I became very discouraged. Our textbook painted marriage to be a lifelong chore with little reward. Loveology challenged this, through and through. Yes, marriage requires work, fidelity, and effort, but the love that grows out of it is the greatest reward.

I think, as a teenager myself, recent generations have an irrational fear of losing the "spark" of love. Before reading Loveology, I thought this loss was inevitable. Now, I know a relationship's "spark" does not have to diminish, but it can certainly transform.

As my teacher told us, he does not experience the internal fireworks of their years of dating when he returns home from work and sees his wife. But the feeling of knowing and trusting that she will always be there for him, for the rest of his life, is greater than any fleeting spark.