10 Years Later

 My mom gave me my first Taylor Swift album (Fearless) as a surprise one day after dance rehearsal, when I was ten. I remember using the DVR to tape her performance of "Love Story" on the Grammy Awards so I could watch and rewatch her costume change from a purple to white dress. What followed was a long and deep investment in an artist that still endures today.

I have never really been a "fangirl," except for maybe in the case of Harry Potter. I have a few bands I follow and love, but I frankly do not have the time, energy, or money to invest in celebrities. Still, I have always listened to Taylor Swift; I know all her songs, lyrics, and music videos. I grew up listening to her, and as her music and image aged, so did I. In middle and high school, her tours were always on school nights, and I value my sleep over seeing Taylor on a Tuesday night during peak midterms.

When she released her most recent album Reputation, I actually didn't listen to it right away. I was in the thick of first semester sophomore finals, and I had not really enjoyed the few songs she released as singles. Through a series of good-natured peer pressure and my own desire to give her a chance, I started listening to her album at the beginning of 2018, and I do not think I listened to anything else for two whole months. The songs I thought I had disliked made sense within the context of the album, and I appreciated her continuing artistry.

In late April, I bought two tickets to her stadium tour at Sports Authority Field at Mile High. I gave the tickets to my mom as a Mother's Day gift, and we braved 58,000 people and 90 degree heat to finally see Taylor Swift, after 10 years. Since my college budget is very low, we had spots three rows from the top, on the very edge, which ended up giving us space to dance and a good view of the whole stadium.

     

The show was stunning. All 58,000 people wore wrist bands with colored lights that decorated the stadium as Taylor danced, sang, and celebrated her own growth. She perfectly coordinated the entire production, complete with not-so-menacing snakes, huge drums to accompany her new heavier music, and in-air gondola rides between the three stages. In tradition, she walked through the crowd, surrounded by security guards, and she donned her guitar and sat at the piano to play acoustic versions of her beloved songs. 

She played a variety from all six of her platinum albums, and I cried twice - once during "Love Story," the song I first fell in love with, and again during "Long Live," which captures my childhood. I didn't expect her to play "Long Live," as it was a rarely-played song on her under-celebrated album Speak Now. It reminds me of the summer Saturdays of childhood spent frolicking outside, covered in sunscreen and using the hose to escape the heat. Here's the refrain:

Long live the walls we crashed through

All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you

I was screaming, "long live all the magic we made"

And bring on all the pretenders

I'm not afraid

Long live all the mountains we moved

I had the time of my life

Fighting dragons with you

I was screaming, "long live the look on your face"

And bring on all the pretenders

One day we will be remembered

I am so thankful I finally got to see Taylor Swift perform, and I am even more thankful she honored her own tradition while moving forward to a new age. In her, I am reminded of my childhood - the bullies, the broken hearts, the little triumphs, the first kisses - and of my ability to shape my life how I choose - moving on from the past, growing up, coming into my own. 

Taylor closed with "This is Why We Can't Have Nice Things," which was my anthem during the second semester of my sophomore year when I was trying to find the good in people who continued to hurt me and ultimately had to take care of myself before others. My favorite line is "And here's to my mama, had to listen to all this drama," and I am certainly so thankful for a mother who has listened to me laugh, cry, and tell endless stories my whole life, especially supporting me from so far away in college. Ten years after listening for the first time, I am filled with so much love for strong women, for dependable girl friends, for Taylor Swift, and for my mom.